How can I prevent alcohol and other drug use and harm?

The influence of parents

Communicating with your child

Peer pressure

When is it OK for my child to drink alcohol?

More information

The influence of parents

As a parent, you have a huge influence on your children. You also know them better than anyone else, so there is no one better equipped to help them through some of life's challenging stages.

Although there is no way to simply 'drug proof' your children, you can have an effect on what your child believes and how they behave, and this can help to reduce the chance that your child will experience harm from drug use.

You can influence your children by:

• setting clear boundaries for your child that reinforce your beliefs and values about alcohol and other drugs. This gives your child consistent messages, and makes it more likely that they will respect your boundaries.
• making your feelings known. Research shows that if parents disapprove of teenage drinking, their teenagers are less likely to drink alcohol.
• talking openly and honestly about alcohol and other drugs with your children. Make sure they understand the reasons behind your views on alcohol and other drugs.
• setting a good example by using alcohol and medication responsibly. Young people are very good at identifying double standards, so being aware of how you use alcohol and other drugs may help establish your credibility when talking about these issues.
• letting them see you having fun without alcohol or other drugs.

Download a fact sheet on ways in which parents can influence teenage drinking.

Visit the Victorian Department of Education and Early Childhood Development (DEECD) website to download a fact sheet on 'Which parental factors influence young people's choices about alcohol?'[PDF:1MB](new window)

Factors that can protect your child

It has been shown that young people who cope positively with life's ups and downs have one or more 'protective factors'. These protective factors help make young people more resilient, and include:

• strong family bonds, with clear rules about behaviour and responsibilities
• a strong sense of self worth
• a good network of friends, and involvement in sporting or interest groups
• opportunities to contribute to meaningful experiences at home, school and in the community
• high and positive expectations of themselves and others.

You can help your child foster these protective factors.

Read a scenario about making decisions about allowing young people to attend events where alcohol and other drugs may be available.

Communicating with your child

Talking openly and honestly about alcohol and other drugs with your children is a practical and positive step you can take to prevent drug and alcohol problems.

For many young people, adolescence is a time for experimenting and risk taking. During these years excitement may come from such things as getting a driver's licence, getting into a pub, sexual contact and using alcohol and other drugs.

Some families find it difficult to discuss these sensitive issues, but open communication will help your child feel supported, and may reduce your concerns as well.

When you talk about drugs (or any other sensitive issue) with your child, try to put yourself in their shoes, and think about what they may be feeling. You have been through adolescence yourself, and will have some understanding, even if your experiences may not have been exactly the same as your teenager's.

Don't fall into the trap of telling them what they should be doing or thinking, as they are only likely to become defensive, which will prevent effective communication.

How will I raise the topic?

A good time to begin talking with your child about drugs could be when you are giving them a dose of medication, such as paracetamol for a headache. You might direct the conversation around to talking about other kinds of drugs, including alcohol.

Some other good opportunities to talk might be when alcohol or other drugs are mentioned on TV, in music videos or in magazines; or when you and your child see someone under the influence of alcohol or other drugs.

Read a scenario about raising the topic of alcohol and other drugs with your family.

How can we talk about it?

Make sure you are well informed. Learn the facts about alcohol and other drugs and talk openly and honestly with your children. Also listen carefully to what they tell you.

Try not to lecture. Use these opportunities as a way of bringing up the topic of drugs, by asking your children's thoughts and feelings. It is also an opportunity to express your own thoughts and rules about alcohol and other drug use. For instance, it is okay to say, "Under-18s in this family are not allowed to drink alcohol." However, you should explain why this is the case.

If your message is that you disapprove of drug use don't be afraid to make that clear, but make sure you follow this up with an explanation. For example, explaining that your concern is about your child's safety, is likely to have a greater impact than trying to control their behaviour by simply telling them what they should and shouldn't be doing.

Remember that, as they get older, young people will make their own decisions about whether or not they will experiment with alcohol or other drugs. A useful approach is to talk to them about how to stay safe.

Visit the Victorian Department of Education and Early Childhood Development (DEECD) website to download a fact sheet on 'Teenage drinking: parents' communication style can make a difference'.

Peer pressure

All teenagers and young people experience peer group pressure of some kind. The choices your child makes about alcohol and other drugs are likely to be influenced by their peers.

Some teenagers will be influenced to behave in specific ways because they want to be liked and to fit in. They may feel that if they don't go along with the group they will be isolated and left out.

You can help your teenager to deal with peer pressure by getting to know their friends.

• Make a point of encouraging them to invite their friends home.
• Spend some time with your child's friends and assess whether they are positive influences. 
• Try to get to know the parents of your child's friends. This can help when you are negotiating boundaries.

Talk with young people about peer pressure

Let them know that you understand how difficult relationships can be at their age, and that their need to fit in and be accepted is important.

Help them to understand that a friend who is pressuring them to do something that may be harmful is not much of a friend. Encourage your child not to let others manipulate, or make decisions for them.

When is it OK for my child to drink alcohol?

The Australian guidelines to reduce health risks from drinking alcohol recommend that for children and young people under 18 years of age, not drinking is the safest option.

• Parents and carers are advised that young people under the age of 15 years are at greatest risk of harm from drinking and it is especially important that they do not drink alcohol.
• Young people aged 15–17 years should delay their first drink for as long as possible.

Healthy men and women aged over 18 years:

• should drink no more than two standard drinks on any day to reduce the risk of an alcohol-related injury or disease during their lifetime
• should drink no more than four standard drinks on any one occasion to reduce the risk of an immediate alcohol-related injury.

Get the fact sheet. Teenagers and alcohol: a quick guide for parents.

Should parents give their teenagers alcohol?

Many parents give alcohol to teenagers and young adults at home so that they can supervise their drinking.

While this may sound like a good idea, it can actually be a major cause of alcohol-related problems—even more than poor communication with parents, or poor parental control. Young people who drink alcohol at an early age are more likely to drink more often, develop social problems related to drinking, and to develop a dependence on alcohol.

A number of states in Australia have laws that make it an offence for a person to supply alcohol to someone who is aged under 18 on private property without parental consent. Find out more about secondary supply laws.

The best way of protecting your child from the problems related to drinking alcohol, is to set clear, alcohol-specific rules that aim to discourage them from drinking alcohol for as long as possible.

Download a fact sheet about the dangers of adults supplying alcohol to young people.

See the 3 webinars and 4 podcasts produced as part of the Victorian Government's Teen Drinking Law campaign in 2012.

More information

For more information on this topic read Talking with your teenager about alcohol.

Also, the Victorian Department of Education and Early Childhood Development (DEECD) and the Australian Drug Foundation (ADF) have developed 8 fact sheets that support parents to protect children from harms associated with alcohol use.

Read tips for planning a teenage party.

Read more scenarios about parents dealing with young people, and alcohol or drugs.

Find out what to do if you suspect or find out your child is using drugs/alcohol?

Get help and support

Find more parenting strategies for preventing adolescent alcohol misuse.

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Last updated: 13 March 2013